I was recently talking to a friend of mine. We, accidentally hit on the topic of women thinking a lot. I had this opinion that there is something wrong with females, they misuse their brains by thinking about arbitrary things.
Sadly, this friend of mine was one from the thinking-too-much-species. And she had exactly the opposite opinion about men. She says, "We think ahead for both of us in a conversation and these guys find it hard to think for themselves". She went on to say that women keep track of most of their conversations and kind of defer their judgment of the other person and their own liking for them for a while. They would form intermediate impressions. But, they would keep updating them with every conversation. One wrong statement (different from what they expect) might form the basis for their understanding of a conversation that would have happened a week ago. Truly surprising and irritating. Isn't it?
Understandably, this might be on of the reasons for their high levels of insecurity. Or is it the other way round? Is insecurity the reason for their weird way of thinking.
Anyways, for those from the thinking-too-much-species. Men don't think about every arbitrary thing. As far as I understand and experience, we do take history into consideration. But, mostly it would be in the way of summaries. Immediately after a conversation or a ride or a date, we come to one conclusion - it was good/bad. And no changing it. We just use this and build on top of it. Sadly, we don't notice what you are wearing, unless you are very special to us or we are busy with our hobby of bird-watching. Is your pendant a real/fake diamond? Are you wearing studs or hangings on your ear? These are questions too tough to answer.
Done with the conversation, being as jobless as I am, one would definitely muse over it. I too did.
I went on to think about womens' preferences and likings. Would they like those men that behave exactly as they expect? My man brain suggests otherwise. I feel that one should like surprises and people who bring them. But given their weirdness, I couldn't come to a conclusion as to whether they would like surprises. I went on. If they like surprises (the typical programmer comes in here with his if statement :-( ), would they like people who give them pleasant surprises(turn out better than their expectations) or would they like those who sweep them off the ground completely by being completely different.
I need to know this to anticipate and behave accordingly. But, I had no examples to make this inference. My brain started analyzing movies that I watched. Movies seem to be contradicting each other with regards to this principle. But then, most of the cine-people are men. So, their movies seem to be their expectations.
Conversation: She went on, mentioning about their multi-thinking abilities. It seems women think about things arbitrarily. One second they would be talking to their boyfriend about those sweet moments that they shared an year ago. At the same time, they (still in the conversation) think about that dress they didn't buy yesterday night and wonder if it was a good decision. The very moment, they would be assessing their conversation with their boss in the elevator that morning. All this while ( 2 seconds) being in conversation with their boyfriend. Poor guys.
Later, I went on to think about programs being like female thoughts. They wouldn't have spatial or temporal (time) locality - the driving force behind many design and engineering decisions. Programs are definitely male.
I am pretty sure, you think that I am being random. Thinking about multiple things at the same time. No, I am thinking about random things but one after the other, not all at once.
For my random thoughts, only if I could have a thought recorder... people could have found transformations to find perfect randomness and random numbers.
This all began with Why and how do women think.
Welcome to my blog.
Sadly, this friend of mine was one from the thinking-too-much-species. And she had exactly the opposite opinion about men. She says, "We think ahead for both of us in a conversation and these guys find it hard to think for themselves". She went on to say that women keep track of most of their conversations and kind of defer their judgment of the other person and their own liking for them for a while. They would form intermediate impressions. But, they would keep updating them with every conversation. One wrong statement (different from what they expect) might form the basis for their understanding of a conversation that would have happened a week ago. Truly surprising and irritating. Isn't it?
Understandably, this might be on of the reasons for their high levels of insecurity. Or is it the other way round? Is insecurity the reason for their weird way of thinking.
Anyways, for those from the thinking-too-much-species. Men don't think about every arbitrary thing. As far as I understand and experience, we do take history into consideration. But, mostly it would be in the way of summaries. Immediately after a conversation or a ride or a date, we come to one conclusion - it was good/bad. And no changing it. We just use this and build on top of it. Sadly, we don't notice what you are wearing, unless you are very special to us or we are busy with our hobby of bird-watching. Is your pendant a real/fake diamond? Are you wearing studs or hangings on your ear? These are questions too tough to answer.
Done with the conversation, being as jobless as I am, one would definitely muse over it. I too did.
I went on to think about womens' preferences and likings. Would they like those men that behave exactly as they expect? My man brain suggests otherwise. I feel that one should like surprises and people who bring them. But given their weirdness, I couldn't come to a conclusion as to whether they would like surprises. I went on. If they like surprises (the typical programmer comes in here with his if statement :-( ), would they like people who give them pleasant surprises(turn out better than their expectations) or would they like those who sweep them off the ground completely by being completely different.
I need to know this to anticipate and behave accordingly. But, I had no examples to make this inference. My brain started analyzing movies that I watched. Movies seem to be contradicting each other with regards to this principle. But then, most of the cine-people are men. So, their movies seem to be their expectations.
Conversation: She went on, mentioning about their multi-thinking abilities. It seems women think about things arbitrarily. One second they would be talking to their boyfriend about those sweet moments that they shared an year ago. At the same time, they (still in the conversation) think about that dress they didn't buy yesterday night and wonder if it was a good decision. The very moment, they would be assessing their conversation with their boss in the elevator that morning. All this while ( 2 seconds) being in conversation with their boyfriend. Poor guys.
Later, I went on to think about programs being like female thoughts. They wouldn't have spatial or temporal (time) locality - the driving force behind many design and engineering decisions. Programs are definitely male.
I am pretty sure, you think that I am being random. Thinking about multiple things at the same time. No, I am thinking about random things but one after the other, not all at once.
For my random thoughts, only if I could have a thought recorder... people could have found transformations to find perfect randomness and random numbers.
This all began with Why and how do women think.
Welcome to my blog.
3 comments:
a very nice post, Kasha.. :-)
I agree that women give serious thought to arbitrary & intricate details!
To
Dr. Karthik Shashank Kambatla
PhD in Computer Science & Women Psychology
Thats indeed a great post. Programs are definitely male, just like Bajaj Pulsar... Cool!
-Layman
I am surprised that you chose this topic to be your first blog post! Its useless to argue or think what women think and don't.
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